January 2010

Doctor Who Season 1

January 27, 2010
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Martin Luther King, Jr. delivered his ‘I Have A Dream’ speech on August 28, 1963. Three months later the first episode of Dr.Who aired. FORTY SEVEN YEARS LATER we finally have a black president and Dr.Who is still on the air. You’d have to watch nearly five decades worth of episodes to get caught up. [...]

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twitter on 2010-01-25

January 25, 2010

Had a dream about Rikki-Tikki-Tavi the mongoose fighting a cobra behind my living room couch. # Invented a board game featuring hungry, hungry hippos- except the hippos hunger for the truth. I call it ‘Enlightened Enlightened Hippos’ #

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Julia

January 25, 2010
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Tilda Swinton bare asses her way though the first quarter of this movie as a boozy oversexed tosspot. She spends the rest of the movie fully clothed as a boozy kidnapping tosspot who steals a wealthy old man’s grandson as a favor for her crazy Mexican neighbor. I wonder if Tilda Swinton was like ‘We’re [...]

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Watchmen

January 20, 2010
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This movie, which people said was “unfilmable”, sure did get filmed. I guess what they meant was if it did get filmed, it wouldn’t be any good. But it was good! So for the first time in the history of known civilization, someone said something was going to be bad and it turned out to [...]

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District 9

January 19, 2010
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If you had to distill this movie into one minute it would be Peter Jackson shooting a futuristic laser gun into the air and yelling ,’I do not care for human rights abuses and racial intolerance!’ In District 9 an unlikely friendship develops between one of a million lobster looking aliens (called prawns) stalled out [...]

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twitter on 2010-01-18

January 18, 2010

I tell you what I need- I need a haircut. # Conan playing out the last days of The Tonight Show is a work of art. # “I am Senor Chang. And I’m so ill. This is a warning – I can’t be killed.” -Damn Community is a good show. # One of four lights [...]

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Big Fan

January 15, 2010
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Robert D. Siegel, the man who wrote ‘The Wrestler’ and ‘Big Fan’, sure does like athletics and having his main characters suffer from serious health problems. The wrestler with his heart condition, Patton Oswalt’s character in ‘Big Fan’ with his brain damage- the next movie Siegel writes is going to be about diabetes and star [...]

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Batman: Arkham Asylum

January 15, 2010
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Well, Batman, looks like you’ve captured your brilliant mad arch-nemesis the Joker again. Where you gonna put him? Arkham Asylum? Hope he doesn’t break out and cause any havoc. I mean, he broke out all those other times, but surely he won’t—oh wait he’s out. And it looks like he’s freeing all your other worst [...]

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Torchwood

January 11, 2010
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Torchwood is the best science fiction show I will never ever be able to convince my girlfriend to watch. As the British say, it is really “posh” and “spot on” and “crumpets” and “bangers and mash”. I got that right, didn’t I? I’d hate it if the queen was reading this review and spit her [...]

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The Neon Koala

January 11, 2010
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Spooner

January 7, 2010
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This book is partially set in Milledgeville, Georgia and written by an author from Milledgeville, Georgia. Too bad books can’t understand words, because then I’d say “Hey book- crazy coincidence- I”m from Milledgeville, Georgia!” And then the book could ask me what year I graduated high school and if I know its cousin, the newspaper. [...]

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(500) Days of Summer

January 5, 2010
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Well, I finally saw this damn thing. In 5DoS a nattily dressed Joseph Gordon-Levitt deals with precocious and frustrating Zooey Deschanel, and his fragile heart is nearly torn asunder beneath his vest and tie. iTunes! Feist! Origami birds! Big Headphones! I’m surprised I didn’t get a free iPod Nano just for watching this film. But [...]

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World’s Greatest Dad

January 5, 2010
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Robin Williams tricks a whole high school into thinking his dead son was great, and tricks a goth girl into thinking Bruce Hornsby is great. Also, Alexie Gilmore dances briefly around in her underwear, and then her underwear becomes pivotal to the plot. This movie features one of the finest school mascots ever committed to [...]

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Nothing but Strikes at Mid-World Lanes

January 4, 2010

If you’ve read ‘The Dark Tower’ series by Stephen King, you might remember the todash bag that Father Callahan had with the black orb in it. The one that read ‘Nothing but Strikes at Mid-World Lanes’ on the side. I designed a Mid-World Lanes logo to go on an actual messenger bag, so I can [...]

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Sherlock Holmes

January 3, 2010
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Robert Downey Jr plays S. Holmes as a foppish dirty brawling genius and Jude Law is his best friend Watson with a neat little mustache. You better believe some rakish hats get worn while they run around London punching every criminal’s filthy Dickensian face. Here’s a word of advice to you if you want to [...]

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To Sleep With Anger

January 3, 2010
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It’s hard not to get spooked by Danny Glover as Harry, the world’s worst house guest. Unless you like having the Devil over to sleep on the floor of your guest room. You can’t blame this southern religious family for taking him in- they used to know him back in the day when everybody carried [...]

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