SM: How would you recommend we recognize you in the afterlife?
EB: If i’m in heaven I’ll be with my family and my dogs. If i’m in hell i’ll be eternally bitch slapping karl rove.
SM: Please describe your appearance in the land of sleep and dreaming.
EB: In my dreams I’m an editor. I guess I’m at a flatbed, or a Macintosh, trying to rearrange things.
SM: When is the last time you found yourself in an unexpectedly advantageous situation?
EB: Can’t reveal because I’m still getting away with it.
SM: What is one thing you know to be true?
EB: Bigotry is a disease, and a political ally, but it would be better if it were only a disease.
SM: In the middle of the interview, an anecdote is requested.
EB: Tonight I watched “the ratcatcher” followed by “white” on a flat screen tv. Afterwards I rubbed my eyes and both contacts popped out simultaniously.
SM: What is a question you’ve always wanted someone to ask you?
EB: Why for you nevah?
SM: What is your first reaction to the sight of an empty intersection in the middle of the night?
EB: I could smash the red light camera and no one would see me.
SM: If you had to fight a person who was your polar opposite in every respect, how would you fight them?
EB: With boxing gloves in a barn.
SM: What song would you like to hear on the day before the day you die?
EB: The star spangled banner (and have it inspire pride not sorrow)
SM: Please describe an impressionable moment from your teenage years.
EB: Went skinny dipping with a girl at ala moana and the sand police caught us.