Interview with Philip Warner of Lithium Picnic Photography/Suicide Girls

SM: Please describe your most recent brush with danger.

PW: Driving in LA traffic last week. They like to honk. LA drivers tend to view their horns as a tool for punishing.

SM: When was the last time you felt like you were very close to understanding something intangible?

PW: About 10 years ago. That isn’t a part of my brain that I allow free reign these days… I practice optimistic pragmatism and try to focus on the tangible. One day at a time. I know what I know if you know what I mean.

SM: What is the closest thing you know of to dreaming awake?

PW: This feels like a trick question to get me to talk about my sex life. There’s an answer buried in there if you dig.

SM: When was the last time you felt a sense of mysterious urgency?

PW: Every time I take uppers to get the house cleaned.

SM: Please enliven our day with an anecdote.

PW: Well I’m no doctor, but I once read that chewing bay leaves can counteract the poison from a copperhead bite. I haven’t tried it. Mema said wet tobacco from cigarettes made into a poultice would keep fire ant and bee stings from swelling. I think I tried that.

SM: If your eyes came down with amnesia, how would you jog their memory so as to be able to see again?

PW: A jab with sharp pointed stick? Hmmm… The user interface to photoshop would likely ring a bell as they tend to be glued to it 8-14 hours a day.

SM: How close is what we fear to what attracts us?

PW: Closer than I care to think about right now.

SM: Which would you rather have in your mailbox each morning:
1.A new and different photograph of heaven
Or
2.A photograph of the most important thing that will happen to you the following day.

PW: Wow. That question made me revaluate my priorities in life. For about 12 seconds. Since there are no guarantees about heaven I would have to go for the important thing a day option. I wouldn’t want to be caught somewhere important without pants or extra batteries for my camera.

SM: Please recommend something memorable to speak aloud moments before your wedding to a rival pirate’s beloved is disrupted by his appearance aboard your ship.

PW: “Hi, dad.”

SM: Please describe an impressionable moment from your teenage years.

PW: Tragically discovering the difference between an anecdote and antidote… I thought captured russian spies just had a bad sense of humor.

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