Reviews 08.26.07

Elebits on Wii.
Like a disreputable moving company, the most fun part is carelessly throwing furniture around the room. You know what would be ironic? Getting struck by lightning while you were playing a video game about collecting little fragments of lightning. I’d get the game’s logo engraved on my tombstone if that happened. But then, I’d be dead of lightning, so I’d have to visit my friends in their dreams and instruct them of my final wishes.

Gin and Tonics, House Gin.
Tastes like the bark of a peppermint tree, sometimes. If I had a peppermint tree, I wouldn’t get that worked up about it. Like, yeah, the branches are made of peppermint. Yes, it is next to a river of hot cocoa. No, you can’t wrap a colorful woolen scarf around your neck and frolic here. It’s the middle of an August heat wave in Atlanta. Get a hold of yourself.

The lady who came up to me in downtown Atlanta at one a.m. and told me that I was going to see a lot of “chocolate ladies from now on” and that it must be a culture shock to be here and that I was going to be “kissing chocolate” eventually.
Lady, I didn’t just time travel from Robert E. Lee’s house.

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Reviews. 08.19.07