Tag Archives: Doctor Who

The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones

The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones

In which Jason and Cristen Conger review the trailer for The Mortal Instruments: City of Bones.

JASON

Well, Cristen—I’ve got good news and bad news. The good news is there’s a race of invisible half-human/half-angels running around killing demons on our behalf. The bad news is, they think we’re totally lame. They even call us “mundanes” behind our back. So catty!

In fact, in their TV Guide’s “Cheers & Jeers” section, us humans always get Jeers. I know that your greatest fear has always been that you’d end up in the Jeers column. I hope you can take some comfort from knowing that nobody reads TV Guide anymore, not even the version published by half-angel demon hunters. Also, every month they inexplicably feature Delta Burke on the cover. We get it—she’s half an angel! But the part of her that played Suzanne Sugarbaker was ALL HUMAN.

CRISTEN

I’m bowled over by your insightful connection between TV Guide reviews and the effervescent Ms. Burke because Suzanne Sugarbaker, you see, is fully the human — half-angels aren’t blessed with such voluminous décolletage; it would hamper their flame throwing and demon ass-kicking — embodiment of the Cheer AND the Jeer, the only mortal capable of straddling both ridicule and praise without breaking a sweat. Case in point: Suzanne Sugarbaker didn’t actually go by Suzanne Sugarbaker. Nope, that racially insensitive beauty queen toted around the name Suzanne Sugarbaker Goff Dent Stonecipher acknowledging all three of her failed marriages. She gave not a shit, that Suzanne.

I really wish the Designing Women writers had delved more into the character of Mr. Stonecipher, though. Not that I would ever want the spotlight cast too far away from dear Delta, but with a last name like Stonecipher, I wonder if Suzanne Sugarbaker was last married — and divorced — to some sort of wizard or warlock, not unlike those whom would be hunted down and barbequed to death by a band of Shadowhunters.

And speaking of Shadowhunters, I can’t get that spooky latte art out of my head. That ghoulish face in the cappuccino foam sent shivers down my spine! I tell you what, Jason, if I am ever contacted by half-angels from the other side, it goddamn better be through designs in hot frothed milk. What the hell else could latte art be good for anyway?!

As you can probably tell from my salty language, I get pretty steamed over latte art just like you do. I hope I haven’t hit a nerve by bringing it up.

Through The Door Of The Moon: The Last Days Of The Rainbow Gaits Natural Horsemanship Club

Through The Door Of The Moon: The Last Days Of The Rainbow Gaits Natural Horsemanship Club

“See, I bet you didn’t even know there was a person in there.” said the pretty hair stylist, holding my newly shorn head and admiring her handiwork.

She was right. I’d let my hair and beard run wild in a state of distraction, and my personhood had been feeling debatable.

But thanks to this process of subtraction, a person had been added back into the world. Meanwhile, a slower form of subtraction was happening just down the road, at my grandfather’s house, where my mother was dying of cancer.

Imperial Trouble Episode 92: Too Hot To Handle, Too Cold To Hold

Imperial Trouble Episode 92: Too Hot To Handle, Too Cold To Hold

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This week’s topics include Doctor Who, the Statue of Liberty, a recital of Bobby Brown’s theme song from Ghostbusters II, Dungeons & Dragons parody songs, the Dave Matthews Band and pan-dimensional rifts. Guest hosts: Beau Brown and Jack Walsh.

Imperial Trouble Episode 89: Dragon*Con 2012!

Imperial Trouble Episode 89: Dragon*Con 2012!

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Jason, Sam and Bunny Nick Fury’ed Dragon*Con 2012 and assembled the greatest team of podcast guests the world has ever seen! This episode includes interviews with Harrison Krix of Volpin Props, Grant Imahara of Mythbusters, Mark Meer of Mass Effect, Billy West of Futurama, Beau Brown of Bob and Carl: Sci-Fi Janitors, Sylvester McCoy of Doctor Who, and Jack Walsh of Four Days at Dragon*Con!

Topics include favorite Con costumes, wealthy abandoned babies, the discovery of sugar in space, filling in as C-3PO, a Bob Newhart/Baldur’s Gate crossover, censorship of cartoon violence, puppetry, rolling R’s, and a surprisingly capable impression of Humpty Hump from Digital Underground.

Imperial Trouble Episode 75: The Sober Episode!

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Bunny and Jason clean up their act and discuss the upcoming Star Trek: The Next Generation/Doctor Who crossover, leading to a comparison between the two properties. A debate rages on whether Jason’s dog resembles Batman. Swear words in comic strips and the ultimate sci-fi crossover is also discussed.

Imperial Trouble Episode 59: The Doctor, The Widow and The Wardrobe

Imperial Trouble Episode 59: The Doctor, The Widow and The Wardrobe

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Sam and Jason review Doctor Who episode “The Doctor, The Widow and The Wardrobe” and discuss the Prometheus trailer. Other topics include Jason’s battle against the ants, the death of Bob Anderson, a Taco Bell story, and the Paul Newman film The Hustler.

Imperial Trouble Episode 46: Doctor Who Season Finale with Beau Brown

Imperial Trouble Episode 46: Doctor Who Season Finale with Beau Brown

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Sam, Jason and resident Imperial Trouble Whovian Beau Brown review the Doctor Who Season Finale. Other topics include the Air Bud canon, the terrible fate of Sam’s former website The Police Box and the sitcom Designing Women.

Imperial Trouble Episode 44: Movie Trailers and Doctor Who with Kristina Ackerman of Knuckle Salad

Imperial Trouble Episode 44: Movie Trailers and Doctor Who with Kristina Ackerman of Knuckle Salad

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Jason and guest host Kristina Ackerman review movie trailers for The Adventures of Tintin, The Amazing Spider-Man, Battleship, Brave, The Dark Knight Rises, The Darkest Hour, Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance, The Hunger Games, Real Steel, Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows, Tucker & Dale vs Evil, and We Bought A Zoo. Other topics include the Doctor Who episode “The God Complex” and Russian comedian Yakov Smirnoff.

Imperial Trouble Episode 43: Doctor Who Series 6 and the Star Wars Blu-ray release

Imperial Trouble Episode 43: Doctor Who Series 6 and the Star Wars Blu-ray release

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Sam and Jason share their thoughts on Doctor Who Series 6 Part 2 and the Star Wars Blu-ray release. Other topics include getting your ass handed to you in Deus Ex: Human Revolution, getting sick after Dragon*Con and getting philosophical about what the Doctor represents to different genders.