Tag Archives: Gary Oldman

Don’t Ask What The F Stands For: A Passionate Entreaty To The Omnicorp Board Of Directors On The Subject Of The New Robocop

Don’t Ask What The F Stands For: A Passionate Entreaty To The Omnicorp Board Of Directors On The Subject Of The New Robocop

[The following text is taken from the official transcript of the OmniCorp Board of Directors’ annual meeting in New York, N.Y., on Nov. 25, 2013, into which a wild-eyed Kevin Forest Moreau barged, uninvited.]

Esteemed members of the OmniCorp Board of Directors:

I present to you Alex Murphy. Husband. Father. Robocop. A franchise barely alive, following a couple of so-so sequels, a TV series no one saw, and even a cartoon. We can rebuild him, to once again serve as a cutting-edge commentary on aggressive police tactics, corrupt corporations, sensationalistic media and—to add some modern-day topicality—drone warfare.

The Dark Knight Rises: Lurching Purposefully Through The Next Few Frames

The Dark Knight Rises: Lurching Purposefully Through The Next Few Frames

In which Jason is joined by Dan Nadolny for a review of the trailer for The Dark Knight Rises.

J: Who does Catwoman think she’s talking to when she tells Batman to “batten down the hatches”? I mean, he is Batman. It is integral to his nature to batten things. That’s the reason he became a crime-fighter in the first place, to batten fear into the hearts of criminals. Although, I’m willing to acknowledge that I may be a little murky on Catwoman’s use of the word “batten”. But I’m 100% certain that by hatches, she means the baby chickens that Bruce Wayne is hatching under a glow lamp in his study at Wayne Manor. Don’t worry, Catwoman, he’s already battened fear into their hearts, because even though they are CuteOverload.com-worthy baby chicks, they are also ruthless criminals.